Life Story Links: January 6, 2020
“This packrat has learned that what the next generation will value most is not what we owned but the evidence of who we were and the tales of how we loved. In the end, it's the family stories that are worth the storage.”
—Ellen Goodman
“My mother Hilary, aunts Kay and Peggie, and my grandmother Hilda. In those days people dressed up for outings!” wrote Richard Bridgland of this photograph taken at Stonehenge in 1932. Photo courtesy of Richard Bridgland/English Heritage. Read about an exhibition of family photos taken at the Stonehenge, below.
On the Menu: Memories
THE STORY OF A FAMILY, THROUGH FOOD
“My heritage lives in my stomach,” Catherine Lanser writes in “Instructions to the Past,” an ode to two slim, spiral-bound recipe books she inherited from her mother.
“AND THEN, I BAKE.”
Although she can find instructions for any holiday cookie online, Chicago writer Donna Vickroy prefers to pull out her mother’s handwritten—threadbare, dough-stained—recipes each Christmas. “Often, as I’m mixing, I tear up knowing that she was thinking of me when she grabbed pen and paper to write down these very words—butter, flour, enjoy.”
FOOD RITUAL & RECONNECTING
Sharing a family meal can help those with dementia connect. “A good meal made with love can draw out a person with dementia and bring them real joy…even if they've completely gotten to the point where they may not have that connection to the family story."
AN OVER-THE-TOP FOODIE HOLIDAY
Personal historian Sarah White remembers being a newcomer to her husband-to-be’s annual Christmas Eve feast—where family, friends, antipasti, and desserts proliferated amidst the Venetian splendor of his relative’s “Jungle Room.” Bonus: Auntie Mary’s grustali recipe.
It’s in the Telling
THE NAKED TRUTH
“Truth in life doesn’t automatically morph into truth on the page. And living people don’t necessarily come to life in print. It takes creativity—hence the term “creative non-fiction.”” Blake Morrison on how to write a memoir.
YOURS TO TELL
“A story can only be a story if it is told.” College sophomore Trinity Bland shares compelling reasons why her fellow students at San Diego State University should in fact share their personal stories.
CALLED TO SERVICE
“There are fascinating stories all around us, if only we ask,” prompts Maryland–based personal historian Pat McNess, and here she asks a lifelong friend about his time in the Navy.
HEALING EXCHANGES
“We play an integral role in saving history and recognizing the healing power of having one’s story recorded,” Wisconsin–based personal historian Mary Voell writes in this piece about the healing benefits of storytelling.
THE HOSPICE HEART
“Being present for and receiving a life story is one of the great gifts of [hospice] work,” writes Gabrielle Elise Jimenez. “When we are witnesses with presence and clarity...these snapshots and stories become gifts to us and create opportunities for healing...”
Time Travel,Family History–Style
STONEHENGE SNAPSHOTS
The oldest known family photo of Stonehenge dates to 1875, and can be seen on display with other pictures of the ancient stone circle in England, like the one above, at the visitor center through August 2020. If you have one to add to the collection, or would just like to browse the fun photos, click here.
‘THE SURVIVORS’
“Going back through my family’s history has deepened my awe for my grandparents and has given me a broader, more complex understanding of their experience...and the obligation that falls on each of us to uphold that heritage going forward.” On inherited trauma, and writing memoir.
Ringing in 2020
A JOY-FILLED COMMUNION
On the Eve of the December holidays I wrote about how the season can be difficult for those of us missing a loved one—but truly, this message is an ever-green one: Remembering our lost loved ones—out loud, with others who knew them—is a balm to the soul.
THE GIFT OF LEGACY
Tell someone, unequivocally, that they matter to you: By gifting them a chance to tell their stories, to preserve their past, to be heard and validated, you are letting them know that they matter—that they will be remembered.
NEW YEAR, NEW MEMORIES
Two resolutions guaranteed to bring joy to you and others—no low-carb diets or Fitbit tracking in sight!
RETROMANIA
“Every corner of social media seems to be using nostalgia to emotionally manipulate us, beaming us something warm and fuzzy on a cold, shiny screen.” Do we have a nostalgia fixation?
...and a Few More Links
Auschwitz survivor wonders: Was she the reason he was alive today?
Personal historian Gloria Nussbaum interviewed for Northwest50Plus magazine.
Google Photos launches private photo messenger.
Using Snapchat and Instagram as self-curated memory books
Scanner recommendations for digitizing old family photos
Short Takes