“I wish I knew”

A recent article in The Wall Street Journal, “The Questions You Wish You Had Asked Your Parents,” cites a growing interest in people wanting to know more of their family stories.

The uptick in awareness of story preservation is attributed to the rise in home DNA kits, the popularity of family history via sites such as Ancestry, and the younger generation’s comfort level with documenting every aspect of their lives: “Younger people are more transparent and used to telling the story of their own lives, often online for many to see, and expect it from others,” writes Clare Ansberry.

This recent article in The Wall Street Journal indicates that more and more families are realizing the value of preserving their stories.

All of this is no doubt accurate, and I do find millennials in particular curious about their parents’ lives before parenthood and even nostalgic about their own childhoods.

But I would argue that this interest in our collective family history is nothing new—at least, not when talking about family history in terms of stories.

While finding distant DNA cousins is indeed new, wanting to know more about our parents’ lives is not. Unfortunately, all too often people don’t recognize that desire until it’s too late.

I’ve written before about how it may seem like your grown kids don’t care about learning about your life—but that in fact, they merely don’t care to pay attention just yet. And that’s the key here: We either need to get the younger generations to realize the urgency in capturing their elders’ stories, or convince the older generations that not only do their stories matter, but that they will be treasured by their family when they are gone.

Is story preservation a new trend?

The message of that WSJ article is that, apparently, both of these things are happening—changes are afoot that are opening our eyes to the need—and value and desire—for documenting our family stories.

I hope this is the case. I know personal historians such as myself and those quoted in the article are making every effort to spread the word and stress the importance of preserving our legacies.

I’m not convinced, though, that enough people are on board.

I hope that more and more people begin to see the value in asking their parents about their lives before parenthood.

I hope that more and more people realize that now is the time to begin asking—not later, not when it’s more convenient or they’re less busy.

I hope that more and more family elders acknowledge that their lives have been interesting, that the paths they have taken hold lessons for the next generation, and that their stories matter.

Most of all, I hope that you FEEL the urgency and take the first step toward preserving your family’s stories for posterity.

Avoid having to say, “I wish I knew.”

If you’re a DIY’er, consider writing about your life or interviewing your family members.

If you would like to explore how working with a personal historian can make the process easier and yield a more professional product, please reach out to chat.

What I know: I still hear from far too many people about the regrets they have: not asking their parents about their lives until it is too late; until dementia has crept in, or their parents have passed.

It is my mission to help people have no regrets. Won’t you join me in this mission?