Don’t call it a memoir. Just write your life.
Blogger and memoir writer Jerry Waxler says, “Vast numbers of people are aspiring to become storytellers, turning this into a boom time for the story arts.” Waxler teaches workshops where, he says, “people come with such longing to try to turn life into story.” That’s why people come to me, as well.
Telling stories
Why write your life?
Far from being narcissistic, “memoir is about handing over your life to someone and saying, This is what I went through, this is who I am, and maybe you can learn something from it,” says Jeanette Walls, author of The Glass Castle.
“It’s honestly sharing what you think, feel, and have gone through. If you can do that effectively, then somebody gets the wisdom and benefit of your experience without having to live it.”
This insight could as easily apply to a different type of writing about your life.
Writing a memoir not only sounds intimidating, but it also can seem lofty, maybe a little out of reach. Telling stories, though—that’s something accessible, more easily accomplished. And if done right, those disparate stories can have an equally profound effect on your family members and loved ones.
For that’s who I encourage you to share your story with: your children, and their children after them. Imagine the gift you’ll be giving when you share stories that make them laugh, cry, and know the reach of love.
Short stories, bound together by narrative thread
As a journalist, I am all too aware of the appeal of bite-size information (I have watched long-form journalism fall by the wayside as the media landscape has evolved over the years). We’ve become accustomed to sharing thoughts in 140 characters or less, and captioning our filtered Instagram photos for the greatest #impact.
But while I recommend sharing your stories in mini-narratives (and sometimes even list form), I don’t do so because of this trend toward brevity.
I suggest this form because
I think it engages people most readily and provides just the right amount of detail to both inform and tug at the heartstrings;
it falls within the range of most people’s writing ability; and
it is do-able (the worst-case scenario in creating a family narrative is to never do it, whether because the task is too daunting or it’s taking so long you never finish!).
And when you work with a qualified editor to help you find the narrative thread that binds your stories together—to add context, uncover meaning, and invite reader engagement—that once seemingly unreachable goal of writing a “memoir” is suddenly within reach!
Where to begin?
Consider…
writing in a daily journal,
setting aside two hours per week to devote to your life story writing,
or finding a likeminded partner with whom to exchange your writings (both to give you a reader and to provide a form of accountability).
If you would like to preserve your stories but you know you will never sit down to write them yourself, reach out to see how we can work together; often a personal historian is the answer for an aspiring memoirist who hasn’t yet taken the first step.
A while back I wrote about easy ways to find your way into life story writing, so if you’re ready to start, read this first!
How to plan a life story book in 3 simple steps
Here’s one time I gave in to my client’s preferences that still haunts me: Why we did not identify people in any of the photos in their family history book.